The Beginner's Guide To Foot Play In The Bedroom

When it comes to feet, there are those who wish for the banning of sandals, those who are indifferent, and those who can't get enough of them. For the latter group, even if they don't consider themselves foot fetishists, that doesn't mean they may not be curious about exploring foot play in the bedroom.

"In the case of feet, it's more about the visual aspect for some, but for others it may be about sniffing, licking, or otherwise touching feet, including using them during sexual penetration," Kinsey Institute research fellow Dr. Justin Lehmiller told Men's Health. "People may be interested in any combination of these activities, or any other activity in which feet are involved, including being stepped on or helping a partner take footwear on and off."

Lehmiller, who has studied kinks and fetishes extensively, found that 14% of the 4,000 people he interviewed about fetishes and kinks for his book "Tell Me What You Want" report having had a sexual fantasy about feet or toes specifically. But as Lehmiller also points out, just because you fantasize about feet, doesn't necessarily mean you have a fetish for them, as fantasies and fetishes aren't the same.

If you're thinking you need more foot action in the bedroom but you're not sure how to address it with your partner and add it to your sex initiation style, then look no further. We've got you covered.

Before you run your tongue along the arch of your partner's foot or shove your toes in their mouth, you're going to want to talk about your interest in foot play — and get consent, of course. Because not everyone is on board with the notion that feet are a sexual part of the body — despite the fact that thousands of nerve endings make them one heck of an erogenous zone — you might find yourself explaining to your partner why you're interested in feet on a sexual level. You might not be able to pinpoint exactly why, because not all sexual fantasies stem from a specific incident. Just let your partner know your thoughts in a casual, laidback, pressure-free way.

"A great way to start off your foot play exploration is to ask your partner if you can massage their feet," sex educator Searah Deysach told Well + Good. "While tending to your partner's feet, try making eye contact to make it even more erotic." While making eye contact, you can't go wrong with adding a bit of sexual dialogue, too. 

Most people love a good foot massage, so when they're exposed to that and find it enjoyable, they may be interested in pursuing other levels of foot play. For example, maybe they'd consider including lotions or lube, which can offer a new sensation while stroking. Bringing sex toys, like vibrators, into the equation can also stimulate the feet and toes.

Depending on how invested you are in foot play, there are a lot of avenues to explore. Foot play doesn't have to involve just licking and sucking, but if your partner has a penis, you can give them a foot job by stroking the shaft the way you would with your hands. If your partner has a vulva, you can rub their vulva and stimulate the clitoris with your toes. In both these cases, you want to use lube, ideally of the water-based variety. Just don't forget to wipe it off before getting out of bed.

"You don't want anyone to traipse into the bathroom with lubed-up feet," fetish video performer and producer Richard Lennox told Vice. "Either you'll have hard-to-remove wet footprints in your carpet and fuzzy feet, or a slip and fall incident on wood or tile floors."

If you want to take things a step further, you can even penetrate your partner's vagina or anus with a toe or two. But if you do choose to penetrate in this way, not only do you want lube, but you also want to make sure that your feet are clean and your nails are filed down so as to prevent potential tears to the skin or introducing bacteria to your orifices. But to enjoy foot play, you don't have to get involved with penetration. For some, just admiring and worshiping their partner's feet or having their feet worshiped is enough. As long as whatever you engage in is consensual, you should lean into your sexually creative side and experiment with what arouses you and your partner and what feels good.