Use Boudoir Photos To Jumpstart Your Sex Drive (And Your Connection To Your Partner)

When it comes to feeling connected to your partner, there are tons of ways to go about it. Different relationships need different things to make them tick and when couples are lucky enough to find that "it" factor that works for them, it feels like you're on top of the world.

Because there's no one way to sexually connect with your partner, in recent years people have started to explore boudoir photography as a way to spice things up or reignite a flame that has dwindled in their relationship. Setting up a boudoir photography session as either a gift for a partner or a way to feel sexier and more self-confident may not be the most conventional way to keep things hot and heavy with your partner, but it actually works.

According to various medical journals, boudoir sessions increase self-confidence, body-image, and promote a deeper appreciation for oneself. Coinciding with that, a 2001 study published in the International Journal of Eating Disorders found that women who feel good in their skin are more likely to initiate sex, enjoy sexual activity, and even orgasm easier. But because that's just the tip of the iceberg, Women exclusively spoke to LA-based boudoir photographer at Unbuttoned Photography, Claire Pearce, about what exactly a boudoir session entails and the benefits of stripping down to your favorite lingerie in front of a camera.

As much as you might think people get boudoir shoots strictly as gifts for their partners, that's certainly not the only reason. "Oftentimes women will book because they want to give their significant other a gift [for a special occasion]," says Pearce. "It is usually the catalyst to the booking, however, I think that those women, and most others, are doing it to feel better about themselves and how they see themselves."

With each client, Pearce has what's called a discovery call where the details and expectations of the photoshoot are discussed. For example, what the client envisions, the best lingerie brands for the concept, how they should pose, or whether to bring props and similar particulars of the session. Pearce has also found that during this stage, women open up about other factors that might be contributing to their desire for a boudoir photoshoot. "Women will often reveal that they have had past trauma that has negatively affected them, either from childhood or as adults," says Pearce. "So booking a boudoir photoshoot can be very healing and definitely empowering." 

When you're able to temporarily shelf your insecurities and let yourself go, becoming vulnerable in barely-there attire, you're taking back whatever power you've lost along the way. It's truly a beautiful thing. 

According to Claire Pearce, the biggest benefit of boudoir photoshoots is the "greater self-love, confidence, and empowerment," she sees from the sessions. "Probably about 75% of our clients will tell me this is so out of their comfort zone and that they don't see themselves as being sexy," says Pearce. "They will often play down their looks, [e]ven though their partners will see them [as sexy] and tell them that."

When we live life only tapping into certain parts of ourselves, we miss out on the entirety of who we are. The only way to realize your own depth is to allow yourself to be vulnerable and accept that you, to quote Whitman, contain multitudes.

"Through the journey of having a boudoir session and seeing themselves as beautiful and sexy, [clients] begin to change what their inner voice is saying," says Pearce, adding that some clients cry when they first see the images. It's empowering to see yourself in a new light, and the experience can help people embrace their sexuality. It also inspires some, according to Pearce, to step even further outside their comfort zone and shed their lingerie, due to the safe space Pearce creates. "My job is to act like a coach ... and guide them throughout the session," says Pearce. "Boudoir photographers are part photographer, part therapist." In other words, this is something to give a try.