There's No Denying The Red Flags In Donald & Melania Trump's Marriage

Donald and Melania Trump married on January 22, 2005 at a ceremony in Palm Beach, Florida held at the Bethesda-by-the-Sea Episcopal Church. They had their reception at Mar-a-Lago estate, where they also spent their honeymoon. Since then, they welcomed son Barron in March 2006, and more recently, they've become political figures twice over with Donald's two terms as president, with Melania returning as first lady in 2025.

Before their political run, Melania and Donald's relationship was a notable topic of conversation. She's his third wife, following the late Ivana Trump and Marla Maples. Even 20 years ago, when Donald and Melania got together, they were big celebrities who filled tabloids. They've gone through their own twists and turns over the decades they've been together, and they've shown a solid front through some of them. During other moments, there have been some big red flags (Donald's daughter, Ivanka, married Jarred Kushner, and there are some red flags in their relationship too). This doesn't mean that the Trumps will split, necessarily. It just means that they've really gone through some pretty intense moments — ones that would be hard for any relationship to survive.

Donald and Melania Trump met for the first time in 1998 at a New York Fashion Week party hosted by modelling agent Paolo Zampolli. Sure, this is a reasonable enough venue for a model and a New York magnate to meet. The red flag was that Donald was there with another woman as his date, and he still had the audacity to ask Melania out. He was recently split from his second wife, Marla Maples, and was obviously back on the dating scene in a big way. 

The detail was certainly memorable to Melania, who remembered it decades later. In an interview with Harper's Bazaar in January 2016, Melania recalled this curious first meeting. "He wanted my number, but he was with a date, so of course I didn't give it to him," Melania explained. "I said, 'I am not giving you my number; you give me yours, and I will call you.' I wanted to see what kind of number he would give me — if it was a business number, 'What is this? I'm not doing business with you.'" But it turned out that Donald gave Melania every number he had so that she could reach him. She even got the Mar-a-Lago number. So even though Donald was there on a date, he and Melania were able to take it to the next level. 

Donald Trump married Marla Maples in December 1993, just two months after they welcomed their first child, Tiffany. They separated in 1997, though their divorce wasn't officially finalized until 1999. It was in this window of separation but not-yet-divorce that Donald and Melania Trump met and started dating. While they weren't doing anything objectively wrong — Donald and Maples had separated — it seemed pretty rushed, and it smacks a little bit of relationship overlap, which is a red flag in itself. 

There's one more red flag in this situation, one that Melania would have been well aware of: Donald's relationship with Maples started out of infidelity. He had cheated on his first wife, Ivana Trump, with Maples and kept the affair going until the two women had a confrontation in Aspen. In fact, Trump openly admitted that had Ivana not known, he would have kept his affair and his first marriage going simultaneously. "It's possible that maybe it would still be going on," Donald said in a 1994 interview on "Primetime Live." "My life was so great in so many ways ... beautiful girlfriend, beautiful wife, beautiful everything," he later said. "Life was just a bowl of cherries." Yikes! And Melania would have certainly heard about that interview and Donald's lack of interest in transparency in relationships. It sure sounds like the old adage: Once a cheater, always a cheater. 

For some couples, there are signs that taking a relationship break won't work. For others, like Melania and Donald Trump, some time apart actually turned out to be okay. They broke up once, in the early days of their relationship. This happened because Melania saw one of Donald's ex-girlfriends, model Kara Young, leaving his apartment. Author Ronald Kessler wrote about the moment in his book, "The Trump White House: Changing the Rules of the Game." Melania and Donald were set to go on a trip to Mar-a-Lago, but she ditched him."[Donald] had dated Kara for almost two years, and what did Melania do? She broke up with him," Kessler told People when discussing his book. "She said, 'Screw that, I don't care about all his billions of dollars, I am breaking up,' and she called [Donald's former butler Tony Senecal] at Mar-a-Lago to send all her clothes back." 

Melania was gone, but not for long. In fact, her anger was a turn-on for Donald, who tried extra hard to secure Melania for good. "The next week, she was back," Senecal explained to Kessler in "The Trump White House." "When she called me, her suitcases were still on the plane in New York. When they came back and she came back, I just carried them back into the mansion kind of laughing." While it all worked out, it's certainly a red flag that an ex was leaving Donald's apartment just as he and Melania were supposed to go on a trip together. 

Another red flag in Donald and Melania Trump's relationship was that he joked about being absent from any kind of parental duties. Adhering to antiquated gender norms, Donald said that he wouldn't help Melania when taking care of their child. He even went so far as to say he wouldn't see their kid. In a 2005 interview with Larry King, just after their wedding, Donald and Melania expressed the desire to have a child. However, Donald made it quite clear ahead of time that this would be mostly Melania's domain. 

"There's nothing like a good marriage, and there's nothing like having children," Donald told King. "I have four great children. If you have the money, having children is great. Now, I know Melania, I'm not going to be doing the diapers. I'm not going to be making the food. I may never see the kids, frankly. No. She will be an unbelievable mother. I'll be good father, but I'll be, you know, doing my deals." Shortly after, in March 2006, Barron Trump was born. It's safe to say Melania was the only one changing his diapers, and such a lack of equity when it comes to child care can certainly be a red flag. It's not completely uncommon for household chores to cause relationship arguments, and many couples try to collaborate on a genderless arrangement. But not these two! 

Perhaps the biggest red flag of all is that Donald Trump and Melania Trump's marriage is marked by allegations of infidelity. Shortly after their son, Barron Trump, was born, Donald reportedly had an affair with Stormy Daniels. It certainly links back to his history of infidelity, when he cheated on his first wife, Ivana Trump, with Marla Maples. Shortly before Donald's 2016 election, Michael Cohen allegedly paid Stormy Daniels $130,000 to stay quiet about their relationship. It led to a criminal trial, as the funds were misleadingly labeled as legal fees rather than hush money. 

In court, Stormy Daniels claimed that she and Donald had sexual relations in 2006, when Melania was home with their infant son. Donald has continued to deny these accusations. Melania avoided the trail and washed her hands of it, claiming that it was Donald's issue to take care of, not hers. Whatever actually happened between Donald and Stormy Daniels, dealing with these allegations and the subsequent trial couldn't have been easy on his and Melania's marriage. Clearly, since they're still together, Melania and Donald were able to work it out, but it likely was no small thing. 

Typically, when a person runs for office, their partner and family rally around them as they campaign. When it comes to Donald and Melania Trump, the latter has been notably absent from many of her husband's political events. In 2015, as Donald was running for his first presidential term, Melania was hardly with him on the campaign trial. She told Barbara Walters that it was for their son, Barron Trump. "It's my choice not to be there [on the campaign trail]," Melania said. "I support my husband 100 percent, but... we have a 9-year-old son together, Barron, and I'm raising him." Yet again, in 2024, when Donald ran a second time, Melania was hardly ever with him. 

On top of that, when Donald was elected in 2016, Melania didn't join him in the White House for several months. This is an unusual thing for first ladies. Typically, they move in with their partners as a team. The press made much of her absence, and later, there was talk that Melania stalled in order to renegotiate her prenup. According to her, though, she wanted to give Barron, who was 10 at the time, a chance to finish his school semester in Manhattan. While she should be free to define her role in the White House, it does seem like a red flag that Melania is so absent from Donald's political life.