How Enjoy the First Time You Have Sex After Divorce

Reese Witherspoon and Pico Alexander in the romantic comedy Home Again (2017)
Home Again via Open Road Films

Don't put too much pressure on the situation.

First Sex After Divorce Advice

After a divorce, the thought of getting back on that saddle to ride someone new is probably a bit terrifying.

Sure, you're probably excited and all sorts of ready to get it on with a stranger, but after sleeping with one person for however many years, jumping into bed with someone else can cause a bit of anxiety.

We're here to help squash your worries by offering some sage words of advice on how to make the most of your first sex experience after divorce. Scroll below to get your fix!

Home Again via Open Road Films

Don't Put Too Much Pressure on the Situation

Safe sex is meant to be a fun and exciting experience, so don't let your nerves get the best of you. You'll likely feel the need to put a ton of pressure on the situation, seeing as it's your first time doing it after your divorce. You'll feel as though it needs to be the best sex you've ever had, to a) make yourself feel good and b) get back your ex. But feeling as though you need to make this the sexperience of a lifetime will only cause disappointment or even scare you out of going through with it. Instead, just breathe. Don't think of it as anything more than casual intercourse with a new partner. Push all heavy expectations of the situation out of your head and let your instincts take over. You got this!

Communicate With Your Partner

When the situation arises and you find yourself getting all hot and heavy with someone new, be sure to communicate. Tell them how you're feeling, what you like, what you don't like, and everything in between. It may sound scary to have to do this, but it'll only improve your experience with your new partner. While a lot of sex is rather intuitive, if something doesn't feel right, say something. And if something feels incredibly amazing, shout it from the rooftops. You can't be shy or timid if you're looking for some spectacular post-divorce sex.

Try New Things

Going along the lines of communicating with your partner, now's the best time to try new things. Chances are you're used to sex being done a certain way. You probably did it in the same positions for quite some time with your ex, so why not take the time to switch things up a bit? If there was ever something you wanted to try, tell your partner about it. Don't just do it, because it may not be something they're comfortable with. Instead, ask them and see if it's right for the both of you. But don't get scared or fear what you want is strange or weird. Embrace your kinks and let them make your sexual experience all the more greater.

Don't Compare This Experience to Sex With Your Ex

You'll want to compare your experience with the sex you had with your ex. It's just the way of the world. To bring up one of our favorite clich├ęs, don't compare, it's not fair. It's not fair to you, your partner, or even your ex. Sex is going to be different from couple to couple, so embrace that. Even if your ex did give you the best sex of your life, be open to the fact that your new partner can do exactly the same in an entirely different way. When you find yourself thinking about what your ex would want or do, do the opposite. But again, ask your partner before you act on those instincts.

Make Sure You're Ready to Do This

One of the biggest misconceptions about sex after divorce is that you need to do it as quickly as possible. Find someone you want to fornicate with and go at it. First and foremost, it's important to make sure you are actually ready to have sex. Again, don't feel pressure to do something you don't want to do. While all of your closest gal pals may be talking you up to have casual safe sex with a total stranger, you know yourself better than anyone. So if you know you're not up for it, don't force it. But when you finally do feel comfortable enough to give someone that consent, don't hold yourself back.

Keep the Conversation Going

Have any first time sex experiences after a divorce you're willing to share with us? Were there any tips we left off this list? Tweet us @womendotcom or message us on Facebook!