Tips for Having the Best Sex of Your Life After Menopause

Samantha making out with a man in her office on an episode of Sex and the City
Sex and the City via HBO

Sex doesn't stop after menopause.

Sex After Menopause: How to Have the Best Intercourse of Your Life

Menopause is a bitch.

From dealing with the hot flashes and mood swings to feeling less confident in your body, no woman enjoys going through the trials and tribulations brought on by menopause.

Even when its over, the effects tend to be long-lasting. Your body has changed, and so have your wants, needs, desires, and most importantly, sex life.

We're here to help keep your sex life alive and well by sharing some tips for sex after menopause and more below!

Sex and the City via New Line Cinema

How Sex Changes After Menopause

Menopause can really put a damper on your sex life. Not to be the bearer of bad news, but you'll certainly notice some major changes once you go through menopause. More on those below:

Sex Can Be Painful

Your sexual organs won't shrivel up and die after menopause, but they do become dry. When your lady parts were once great at self-lubricating during sex, that doesn't happen as often post-menopause. This makes your vagina more delicate, so you'll need to be more aroused than ever to fully enjoy sex.

This also doesn't mean you should stop having sex, but rather you should use vaginal moisturizers or lube to minimize discomfort in your nether regions when they're getting penetrated.

You Might Notice a Decrease in Your Libido

This isn't the case for every woman, but many will notice a sharp decline in their sex drive. Once, you were able to go at it with your partner like a rabbit. But now, that might not be the case. The best way to combat this is by eating well, staying hydrated, and exercising. Exercise makes people happy. Happy people enjoy having sex.

Even if you try all that and your libido is still lower than ever, embrace that you might not want to have sex as often as you once did. Plus, there are multiple ways to get yourself off that don't include penetration. Foreplay, anyone?

Achieving an Orgasm May Be a Little More Difficult

A lot of things pertaining to sex get increasingly more difficult as you age, not just because of menopause. You're not as agile, so you may not be able to bend your body into certain positions anymore, nor be able to go at it for hours on end. One of the biggest changes you'll notice is how much more work you and your partner need to put in to achieve an orgasm. Again, you're going to have to re-figure out what works for you, because what once did, might not anymore.

Grace and Frankie via Netflix

Sex After Menopause Tips

Now that you're aware of a few of the major changes you'll experience in your post-menopause sex life, let's get into how to have the best intercourse after menopause below:


Sex changes as you age in so many ways, one of them being what arouses you. While something might've turned you on in your 20s, maybe it doesn't do a thing for you in your 40s, 50s, and even 60s. Don't be afraid to experiment. If something isn't working for you anymore, stop doing it.

Buy Plenty of Lube

As we previously mentioned, you'll likely experience vaginal dryness. Your vaginal ways start to become thin and less lubricated than before, which is why it's critical to invest in some lube of your own. Make sure they're water or silicone-based and not oil-based, so they don't create yeast infections.


Libido decreases for quite a few women after menopause. It isn't the case for everyone, but it does happen. One of the ways to increase your desire for sex is by exercising. The endorphins brought on by exercise make you a happier, healthier individual, and ready to jump in the sack. You don't have to run a marathon, but try to stay active as often as you can.

Get Intimate

You might find yourself being less and less turned on by the thought of going at it like a jackrabbit with your partner. That's not as trilling for you anymore. What you crave is closeness and more intimacy with your partner. So, do that! If dirty talk doesn't do anything for you anymore, try whispering sweet nothings into your partner's ear. More sensual and sweet sex might be what you need, over rough and animalistic coitus. This all goes back to our first point, which is experiment. Don't be afraid to try new things, because you can teach an old dog new tricks.

Stay Safe

Even if you've been with your partner for years and know they've been tested, it's still important to wear a condom and get tested regularly yourself. You can still get an STD no matter your age, but even more critical than that, you'll want to make sure you're on PrEP. This is something you should talk with your doctor about, if you haven't already. Get that conversation rolling ASAP!

Grace and Frankie via Netflix

Let's Keep the Conversation Going

How has your sex life changed post-menopause? Care to share your story with us? If so, tweet us @womendotcom or message us on Facebook.