30 Forking Funny Quotes From 'The Good Place'

The characters in 'The Good Place' getting ready to fly off in a hot air balloon to heaven
The Good Place via NBC

"I wasn't a failed DJ. I was pre-successful."

These Good Place Quotes Are so Forking Funny

We have to admit, we forking love NBC's The Good Place.

When it first aired, we weren't entirely sure how we felt about it, but after a few episodes, it quickly found a place in our hearts.

Not only is it incredibly hilarious in its own unique way, it is also incredibly endearing and sentimental. It really does inspire to be better humans with each and every episode.

Though knowing this beloved series will come to an end after its fourth season, we can't wait to see how it'll all play out.

To keep its memory alive for years and years to come, we've rounded up our favorite quotes from The Good Place for you all to enjoy!

Best The Good Place Quotes

  • "Any place or thing in the universe can be up to 104 percent perfect. That's how you got BeyoncĂ©." -Michael

  • "It's suddenly very important that I get drunk." -Eleanor

  • "I just want to go back to my container of goo and go to sleep." -Shawn

  • "Hi, guys. I'm broken." -Janet

  • "So, making decisions isn't necessarily my strong suit." -Chidi

  • "I just want to sit and stare at nothing." -Tahnai

  • "Man, repressing your feelings is great." -Michael

  • "I have no idea what's going on, but everyone is talking and I should, too." -Jason

  • "Well, I've narrowed it down to two possibilities: yes and no." -Chidi

  • "You died alone because you couldn't commit to anyone." -Michael

Funny The Good Place Quotes

  • "I wasn't a failed DJ. I was pre-successful." -Jason

  • "I mock others to distract myself from the emptiness inside of me." -Eleanor

  • "I can't go, I'm too young to die and too old to eat off the kids' menu. What a stupid age I am." -Jason

  • "Birth is a curse and existence is a prison." -Michael

  • "Fair is the stupidest word humans ever invented, except for staycation." -Shawn

  • "Let's all say white people things. Billy Joel! I found it on Etsy! There was nowhere to park! Did you fill up the Brita?" -Jason

  • "I would say I outdid myself, but I'm always this good. So I simply did myself." -Tahani

  • "It's a rare occurrence, like a double rainbow. Or like someone on the internet saying, You know what? You've convinced me I was wrong." -Michael

  • "Now we're going to do the most human thing of all: attempt something futile with a ton of unearned confidence and fail spectacularly!" -Michael

  • "Why do bad things always happen to mediocre people who are lying about their identities?" -Eleanor

Cute The Good Place Quotes

  • "Principles aren't principles when you pick and choose when you're gonna follow them." -Chidi

  • "Lies are always more convincing when they're closer to the truth." -Michael

  • "You know, sometimes a flaw can make something even more beautiful." -Tahani

  • "It turns out the best Janet was the Janet that was inside Janet all along." -Janet

  • "Pobody's nerfect." -Eleanor

  • "You know, it doesn't matter if you know things, all that matters is what's in your heart." -Jason

  • "Jason, you seem thoughtful and that concerns me." -Tahani

  • "Face it, dude. I'm the best thing that ever happened to you. Because guess what, Chidi? Ya basic." -Eleanor

  • "I wish we'd met the way normal people meet, like at a philosophy conference or after one of my philosophy lectures, or you came knowing on my office door, asking for help with philosophy." -Chidi

  • "I argue that we choose to be good because of our bonds with other people and our innate desire to treat them with dignity. Simply put, we are not in this alone." -Chidi

We Want to Hear From You

Which quote made you want to watch the show again and again and again?

Tweet us @womendotcom or message us on Facebook to tell us!